Teen Girls, Before Going to Homecoming, There Are 3 Things You Should Know

I bet you are so excited to go to the High School Homecoming dance! I’m sure you have spent a ton of time picking out the perfect dress and shoes to wear and you are planning your make-up and the style of your hair. Getting all dressed up and looking pretty and taking hundreds of photos with friends or your date can make you feel so special. This is a big event and I know you want to look your very best. You will have so much fun going to the dance, whether you are with a date or a bunch of friends. I want to give you a little advice that will hopefully help you feel beautiful, be safe, and have a great time. 

Don’t compare yourself to any other girl at the dance. You are beautiful, being YOU. 

First and foremost, please don’t compare yourself to other girls at the dance, whether they are the friends you are going with or other girls you see there. Everyone will have their own unique style in how they appear. You might be tempted to think they look better than you. You might think their dress is more glamorous or their make-up is so perfect, or they have an amazing figure or incredible hair. And you might start to feel a little insecure and wonder if you don’t look as good as you thought you did. You might even feel awkward or lose your self-confidence.

Please don’t let other girls’ appearances influence how you feel about yourself. Every girl will look the way they do because they are all made differently. Your physical traits are exceptional, just as theirs are too. Be proud of the dress you picked out and be confident in how you decided to present yourself. Every detail is extraordinary because no one has your eyes, your hair, your figure, or your face, and you can’t compare yourself to anyone else because they are simply NOT YOU-and, sweet girl, YOU are not them. Embrace who you are because you are the only you there is in this world. Comparison will steal your joy and self-worth- both of which you deserve to have.  

So, show up to this dance with the full assurance that you look AMAZING and celebrate THAT while you can certainly appreciate how other girls look too. 

Please make wise decisions so you can stay safe. 

I know what goes on at these dances and the after-parties too. There are countless ways you might be tempted to do something you really shouldn’t do or try something new that can be dangerous to your health or well-being. Other people might be partying or hooking up, and you can feel the pressure to join them. Please don’t consume anything that can alter your mindset. If you are under the influence of any substance, you won’t be able to make wise decisions that would keep you safe. You could do something you will regret and sometimes, the consequences of really poor choices can be life-changing. When kids get drunk or do drugs, they are vulnerable to being taken advantage of by other kids who are drunk or drugged up too. It works both ways, for sure. But most often, it’s the girls who become victims of sexual aggression, assault, or harassment.  

Please be cautious and set clear boundaries and stick close with another girlfriend wherever you go. You need to respect your body and remember that you deserve to be treated with dignity. If someone makes inappropriate advances on you, have the courage and confidence to tell them that is NOT okay and get out of that situation immediately. If you need to leave the party and you don’t have a way home, ask a trusted friend for a ride or call your parents and they WILL come to get you. I promise you; they will be so proud of you for making this mature and courageous decision! They will want to protect you and support you because they love you and don’t want to see you get hurt. If, for some reason, your parents aren’t available, call another family member or coworker or uber if you have to. 

Have high hopes for a great night, but if things go wrong, do the best you can to make your own fun. 

Everyone has big expectations when they go to special events like Homecoming or Prom because they are often the highlights of the entire year! I’m sure you anticipate dancing to blaring music in a massive mosh pit packed with sweaty kids. You’ll get to see so many people you know and it will be a night filled with lots of laughter and connecting with tons of friends, and some fun flirting and flaunting while being all gussied up like you are. You might hope to meet someone special or have a romantic time with your date if you have one. These dances can be awesome, but sometimes things don’t turn out the way you thought they would. I’ve heard so many stories of bad dates who ended up being jerks, girls getting too drunk, boys getting too physical, and friends just being awful.  

I truly hope none of these things happen to you, but if something doesn’t go your way, try to do what you can to make the best out of your experience. If your date isn’t what you hoped it would be, find some friends to dance with and make your own fun! If the group you went with is doing something you don’t want to do, look for other people to hang with instead. No matter what happens, be responsible for your actions, and try your best to have a positive attitude and enjoy what you can. 

I hope you feel beautiful and bold and brave at the Homecoming Dance. Remember, you have extraordinary physical features that don’t compare to anyone else. You are mature and wise enough to make good decisions for yourself. And you are bold and brave enough to say “no” because you respect who you are and want to stay safe. I hope you have the BEST time no matter what happens. Make this night special and fun in your own way so you can create moments that become wonderful memories.