Dear Son, 4 Things I Hope For You As You Head To College

 

Dear beloved son,

As you graduate high school and head off to college, I want you to know how proud I am of all you’ve accomplished. I think about everything you’ll experience after you leave, and I’m so excited about this next chapter of your life! This is a pivotal transition, leaving our home and heading out on your own, and I hope you’ve learned all you need to be safe and take care of yourself. I know there will be so many more things you will have to figure out through these upcoming years, and I really trust that you will do that well. 

But like every mom who sends her kids off to college, I will worry about how you’re doing and wonder if you are managing your life successfully. Please know I’m always here for you, ready to help you with anything you need. Growing up from this point on can be challenging at times, so always remember that your dad and I still want to actively be in your life and our job doesn’t end as parents once you leave.

As you prepare to go to college, this is what I hope for you as you start your journey away from home. I’m well aware that I’ve told you these things before, and you’ll probably say, “I know, Mom,” but do me a favor and read this anyway, okay?

I hope you stay organized and responsible.

You are pretty organized and responsible, and you know how to take care of yourself, as you tell me so- quite often. That is awesome, and I’m so proud of how much you’ve grown more independent and learned the many life skills you’ll need for college! But here’s the thing- I won’t be around to remind you to do allthethings. As much as you initiate many tasks and manage your time quite well, you won’t have me around to remind you to pick up after yourself or wake you up if you oversleep in the morning. You won’t have me to tell you that you really need to go to bed when you’re up too late playing video games and lose track of time. 

You will have to stay on top of managing your schedule and setting your own limits to keep up with it all. You will be super busy with fun college activities, meeting new people, and trying new things, which will be such an incredible experience! But you’ll still need to keep your academics your highest priority and structure ample time for studying. You’ll also need to pick up after yourself and be considerate of the other students you’re living with, too. This new lifestyle will be a learning process as you adapt to living with other people while staying responsible and organized as well. 

I hope you find true and trustworthy friends.

In college, you will discover a new world full of so many people, and I hope you find caring, responsible, fun, and honest friends who inspire you to be the best version of yourself. I hope you develop deep and lasting relationships with guys (and girls) who are kind, wise, and supportive. It can be hard to find true friends with the same priorities as you. Pick your people wisely, dear son. The people you hang around will strongly influence who you will become. 

Make sure to find friends who want the very best for you, and you should want the same for them. Find friends with goals you admire, and you can learn from each other. I hope you don’t pick people who are only at college to party simply because they are fun to be around. That is a temptation so many college students face as they see all those kids having a blast. Just remember what you want from this experience (especially your educational goals), and stay the course no matter how tempting it gets to veer off the path.

I hope you stay healthy and safe.

When you have the freedom to do just about anything, I hope you still take good care of yourself and do what you can to stay healthy and safe. Please try to have a regular sleep routine and pace your schedule with good time management so you don’t stress yourself out trying to do too much. Make sure you really listen to your body and rest when you’re tired, eat nourishing food when you’re hungry, and always stay hydrated. I know you are groaning and rolling your eyes while you’re reading this, but I am your mom, and I MEAN IT. All those choices seriously affect your physical health- which has a significant impact on everything else. 

I hope you can also find good outlets to have fun, relax, and manage your stress. Those activities will be so important for your physical and mental health. And my son, I’m not naïve to think you won’t do some pretty crazy things at college, and that scares me like nothing else. Listen, honey, PLEASE think before you do anything stupid, reckless, or dangerous. You are smart enough to make the right choices, but the temptation to impress your friends or fit in will be strong- so you must practice self-control.

I hope you stay focused on your academics and still love the degree you chose to pursue.

My hope is that as you take your classes, you’ll continue to feel like the degree you chose to pursue is still the right fit for you. But oftentimes, college students learn along the way that they want to change their plans and pick another career route to take. That is absolutely okay! As you get older and learn more about what you want to do for a living, and you continue to find out more about yourself, it’s smart to keep making ongoing decisions that are best for you. I want you to be happy with your choices and excited about your future! 

This is the time to explore any new educational opportunities and potential career options, so don’t feel stuck on this one path you chose. Do what is best for you, dear son. If you change your mind and find something better, I will support you 100%. You’re still so young and have the rest of your life to keep changing your mind. Just make sure you make these choices for yourself and not anyone else in your life.

Oh, my beloved son, I’m so excited for all you will experience at college despite it being so hard for me to let you go. I might worry about your health and safety and all the choices you’re making. I will surely wonder if you’re managing your schedule and making it to all your classes. I know you think I worry too much, but that’s just what moms do, and I want you to know that just because I worry, it doesn’t mean that I don’t think you are capable of doing ALL these things. I have confidence that you will be okay because you are smart, mature, and ready for the next season of your life. 

Just remember not to mix your whites with the colors, stay healthy and safe, have a blast with your friends, and focus on the main reason you’re investing your hard-earned money and time at college—to get a degree. 

Also, please call and check in with your Mama. I’ll always be here for you if there’s anything you need.