The holiday season is upon us.
Are you feeling the overwhelm and starting to panic?
Stress often rears its ugly head this time of year.
A never-ending ‘to do’ list, trying to find the perfect present for our tweens or teens who have everything and feeling the pressure to create special holiday memories for everyone, can leave us feeling depleted and grumpy.
I have children who loooooove presents, lots of decorations, and have high expectations for everything to be magical. Or is it me?
One thing is for sure, when I put so much pressure on myself to create the “perfect” Christmas, there is bound to be disappointment and guilt. Guilt that my outside lights still aren’t done and no amount of nagging seems to make my husband hurry it on up (literally).
Is it okay to be a normal, slightly under-achieving family, not the picture perfect Facebook version that tends to make us feel like we’re failing badly?
The problem with the illusion of the “perfect” Christmas is it is a lie. There isn’t such a thing. And when we focus too much on the tinsel and place extremely high expectations on ourselves can cause us to lose sight over what is really important.
Presence. That is what matters.
Here are a few questions that I’ve learned to ask myself that helps me to focus on what really matters that might help you too.
7 QUESTIONS TO ASK OURSELVES:
What would it look like to be still, present and to do less?
What really matters to you?
How can you carve out time for those things? What will you do to keep this front and center?
How will you make time to slow down and care for yourself?
What will you do to have fun?
Where can you ask for help when you’re feeling overwhelmed?
What might you let go of that drains your energy (i.e. – this can be family members that irritate you or past hurts, “shoulding yourself,” not asking for help, trying to keep everyone happy)? What will you do to help yourself when these things try to creep in?
What are a few words that describe how you want to show up as your best self??
What really matters to me is being present, connecting with family and having fun.
I will carve out time for these things by letting go of the house being perfect. I’m going to order many of my presents on Amazon.
I’m going to care for myself by making time for downtime. I’m going to savor my coffee and read in the morning before everyone wakes up. I’m going to spend time with my husband and take a yoga class and go for some walks.
I’m going to embrace my playful self and have fun!
I’m going to lovingly detach (as much as I can) from the things that I can’t control – when my kids argue, my relative irritates me, and I’m going to really try hard to not allow all the messes around the house drive me crazy. “Shoulds” and perfectionism suck my energy. So does trying to make everyone happy (so exhausting).
I’m going to ask for help when stress and low-grade resentment creeps in.
I’m going to DO less and BE present more.
I’m going to breathe into the moment when I notice myself on autopilot. I’m going to notice the Christmas lights, smile at the cashier, and enjoy the simplicity of the season.
Connection. Play. Be.
These are my three words!
Thank you for being a part of my community! I am so very grateful for you. xoxo